Sex Is Becoming Boring and We Are All To Blame


Many have tried experimenting with sextoys and different positions. Some have tried supplements and boosters that promise to bring back the spark. Others have even tried going on vacation to spice things up. It all worked but for a short while.

That’s because the problem isn’t that we’re not adventurous enough the problem is that many of us perform sex rather than have sex. There’s a difference! You perform sex when you follow a script. You have sex when you allow your sexual instincts to take over… let me explain.

Ever seen an animal have sex? If you haven’t just google it or tune into an episode of National Geographic you’ll quickly understand why people describe great sex as raw and animalistic.

Unlike our fellow mammals, we don’t know the pleasure of being intimate for the sake of being close. Our psyche is riddled with how we look when we do this and that. Is our facial expression sexy? Do we sound funny when we moan?

There is so much emphasis on looks, position, and technique.

It isn’t surprising! We are the products of HD porn. And sadly, HD porn creates the type of sex that only perfect people feel comfortable watching. For most of us we’re left feeling insecure AF.

I had a dude insist on having sex with the lights off because he didn’t want me seeing his size. I, too, have been guilty of stressing about the dimple on my bum and refusing sex when I hadn’t shaved.

We don’t know how to have sex without comparing ourselves to Mandingo or Juicy Jane. Whether you’re conscious of it or not this suppresses the free flow of sexual energy.

Wouldn’t it be better if we didn’t have internal commanders policing us and holding us back? Wouldn’t it be better if we engaged in pure primal sex? There’s an African proverb that says:

If there is no enemy within, the enemy outside can do us no harm- African proverb

Our sex lives are suffering because we have internalized society’s toxic view of sex, which has in turn created a monster within us. To heal and change the narrative we’ll first have to surrender to the enemy within. In other words if you want someone to love the whole of you, you have to learn to love yourself unapollogetically.

We can start by embracing the most hatred feature of the human body…body hair.

Ladies let your pubes go wild, fellows let your back and chest hair to hang out. Yes, that means laying off the razor and the Brazillian waxing for some time. You’ll be surprised at how quickly your mentality changes.

When I stopped obsessing about being bare and smooth down there. EVERYTHING changed. It’s as though my pubic hair heightened every sensation. Just a little tug, brush or stroke sent shivers down the shaft of my nerve ending. I felt alive! It was a stimulation I had never experienced while bare. I was honestly missing out.

Oh Lordy! the pheromones. Throughout the day pubic hair diffuses pheromones which enhance sexual awareness and the desire for sex. A Whif of my unique scent would drive him crazy. Sometimes he’d just want to put his head on my lap or play with hairs just to take it in.

When every inch of you is adored sex takes on a whole new dimension.

My friend Aaron had an issue with perspiring, he hated it! “Men in porn don’t sweat like I do”, he complained. He wanted to be dry and sexy not wet and slippery. After extensive searching and experimenting he found a way to control his perspiration.

His sex life didn’t get better, instead it got worse. The physical issue he wanted to control morphed into a mental demon that held his sexual fulfillment at ransom.

Once he changed his outlook and stopped restricting his body. He found a woman who was sooo turned on when his body glimmered in sweat,that he grew to love it too. He was further surprised at the number of people on social media platforms that were not grossed out by sweat. His confidence peaked…His sex life soared.
Not everyone dreams of a 7-inch cock or a gigantic butt

One message we’ve all internalized is that one body shape and structure works for everyone. This is false, sexual attraction is so diverse I’m often surprised at what turns me on.

Just because tall, slender and well-endowed bodies is whats advertised as desirable doesn’t mean that’s what everyone wants. What everyone wants is somebody who’s comfortable in their own skin.

Geez have you ever tried to fuck some who’s self conscious… yeah its a nightmare and I have been on both ends of that stick.

When we follow a script we tend to lose ourselves and bury our desires. This represses our authentic sexual expression by a million times. It’s no wonder sex gets boring.

Every single person has some level of repressed sexual desire buried deep within. You just need to be brave enough to bring it to the surface. If you follow your desire, you’ll be surprised what your sexual energy can unlock.

If there’s anything you should take away from this…is to be yourself!! Adhering to your desires has far fewer consequences than if you didn’t. Sexual energy isn’t there to be caged. It is there to flow and transform so let go of society’s rendition of sex and let your instincts guide you.

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